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Imagine that you are Prince William and his long time girlfriend Kate Middleton now engaged to be married .Wow! You’re experiencing all the preparations, speculation and gossip surrounding the nuptials, but what will you need in your daily lives together in the future? Two famous princesses and their husbands who came before them didn’t appear to be very successful in the needs department. Here’s how William and Kate and you can do better.

In any marriage royal or otherwise there are two people who have needs. The need for commitment for a lifetime, the need for communication on all levels in their daily lives, the need to negotiate differences of opinion and preferences, the need to be cherished today and forever, and the need to develop a communion of spirit that expresses the purpose and giving back that develops out of your unique love and relationship. This will include: Who will you be for each other? Will you be friends as well as lovers? Will you cheer each other on when either of you have had a rough day?

Will you encourage each other’s growth or ignore it? Will you remember to touch after the newness is gone? Will you take time to notice what you need or just resent when you finally notice that what you need is missing. Take a few moments to list your needs, share them with your spouse and have them share theirs with you. Maybe you will have to negotiate a few compromises,but this exchange of needs will be invaluable for your relationship.

Whether you are a Prince and soon to be Princess or everyday person, to get what you need in a relationship you have to define it and ask for it. Most of us don’t read minds yet. So I say William and Kate speak up. Let’s this be the fairy tale that lasted. God knows we all need that.