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When we marry, we bring all of our history with us and our partner does too. Maybe we had a great childhood, maybe it wasn’t perfect. As adults we say it was great, even if it wasn’t. Maybe you never felt special to your parents, maybe they preferred your sibling or because they made you special, your sibling resented you. Maybe your family just got by financially, or if they had plenty, only thought what mattered was money. Maybe you were sick as a child or just skinny or fat and took a lot of kidding .The things that aren’t perfect are just the truth. At the same time, many things growing up were wonderful even if some of them didn’t happen with your family. Examples could be good friends, activities like church, sports, scouts, neighborhoods, school and even community. Some things hurt you, and some things made you strong. Life just includes it all.

So you go to college, or not, and you eventually are looking for someone to love. Little do we all know that we are looking for someone to love us whole. To love us so that no matter what happens, we can handle it and not think we are not strong enough, good enough, smart enough, loveable enough or something else to not get through it., and they are looking for this too. My marriage did that for me. That’s the mark of a good marriage for both partners. One day you wake up and you know that you are whole. Maybe this hasn’t happened for you in your first or second marriage. If you get the right person for you and do the work, it can happen.